Monday for us… was the most “Monday” Monday ever…
Monday for us… was the most “Monday” Monday ever.
Jonah slept in. Which is typically nice…when at night… if he’s in his own bed.. But no. He slept in our bed most the night… (and by “slept,” I mean haphazardly rolling all over us kicking us in the face and such)…
So not much sleep for Mama and Daddy. That’s how the story begins.
Jonah is still sleeping. 15 minutes before we have to leave.
Jonny is sitting at the breakfast table, not eating breakfast. Also not dressed.
“Jonny. Eat… JONNY!! EAT YOUR BREAKFAST!!… (repeated every 3 minutes)”
Daddy’s rushing around trying to make the boys lunch. Can’t find the sandwich making stuff… (Jonny won’t eat a sandwich at school anyways, but it keeps the “you don’t pack your kids healthy meals” judgements away.)
Oh. Jonah has apparently woken up.
The boys brought home balloons from a birthday party over the weekend. Jonah decided it would be a good idea that morning to take said balloons upstairs and turn on ALL the ceiling fans in the house.
You can imagine the result. Balloon popped. String wrapped itself around the fan. Child screams in anger. Meltdown ensues.
By this time, Mama had left for work. We had to leave for school within about 10 minutes.
Jonny still hadn’t eaten.
“JONNY! IF I HAVE TO TELL YOU ONE MORE TIME…”
“thirsty.”
…sigh
“Fine.” I go get him a drink.
Jonah is still screaming about the balloon upstairs. Where are MY SHOES?? Did I finish packing Jonny’s lunch?
OH WAIT!! Jonah needs a lunch still too!!! Dangitall!
“Jonny??? Forget your breakfast! Get your shoes and coat on, get in the car, and I’ll be out in a second. … Where’s your back pack?”
“I dunno.”
“GO FIND IT!” I swear, it’s like he’s never gone to school before sometimes (as I look frantically for my shoes, pack lunches, and throw myself together, like I’ve never been through a “morning” before).
Jonah’s still screaming, but I can’t take care of him until I am ready to leave myself… So shoes… shoes… shoes…
COME HERE SHOES!!
AH. There they are…
Where’s Jonah’s backpack? Ah there it is. Gotta make Jonah’s lunch… I open his lunchbox.. and all his foods are still there from Friday. You know… Oreos, chips, crackers, graham crackers… all the “preferred” foods… He still doesn’t eat them.
Oh well. My parts done. He can eat or not eat… his choice.
Keys… Wallet… Phone… Good. GOOD.
OKAY.
“Jonny, I’ve got to take care of your brother. Put some cheerios in a baggie, find your backpack and get in the car.”
“okay.”
“Where’s your coat?”
“I dunno.”
Now it is time to leave. I still haven’t dressed Jonah yet.
“JONNY, DID YOU EVEN FIND YOUR BACKPACK YET??”
“Oh. Yeah. I found it.”
“HOW COME YOU DIDN’T SAY… you know what? forget it. Your binder is in your backpack right?”
“um…”
“Where is it?”
“I dunno…”
*…. me mentally counting to 10***
“Jonny. Please go find your binder. You need it for school. Do you have your coat?”
“no.”
“You know what? I think it’s in the car. If not, you can just borrow a blanket or get a coat out of the “lost and found” or something (yeah.. I was to that point). Just get in the car. Don’t worry about your binder. We should have left 15 minutes ago.
Now, Jonah is still having a meltdown. My brain has not had enough coffee yet… for it tells me that it would be a good idea to just pick him up, take him downstairs and force him to get dressed. Technically he COULD go to school in his pajamas, but it’s pretty cold outside and getting Jonah dressed is the only thing left to do before leaving…
So I try to force the issue by carrying him downstairs mid-meltdown.
And that’s when Jonah WENT OFF.
Screaming. Hitting. Flailing.
Me trying to undress him. Him trying to stay dressed and screaming at me.
“Jonah! We’ve got to go bye-bye, buddy!”
And I’ve got to hand it to him. In the middle of his wailing, he composed himself enough to scream, “UPSTAIRS!!!”
We don’t “get dressed” downstairs, you see. Upstairs is the appropriate place to get dressed for school.
“Okay, bud. I’m sorry for rushing you. We can go upstairs to get dressed.”
And he let me get him dressed. Shoes, pants, coat, everything.
But then I remembered. Jonah hadn’t eaten, OR gone “potty” yet…
And I did the classic “parent thing.”…
“Eh. they can deal with it.”
“LET’S GO BYE BYE JOJO!”
So Jonah got in the car. Jonny had his coat, but not his binder… oh well. Win some, lose some.
We made it to school. 20 minutes late…
Then I had to drive Jonah to HIS school (he attends a different one).
He was a good half-hour late, but they hadn’t marked him tardy or absent yet… Apparently, they had taken bets as to whether we would make it or not.
I told them Jonah had neither gone potty nor eaten breakfast. They told me and I quote…
“Go home. It’s 5 o’clock somewhere.”
Some days, that’s just “life.” You have the most “Monday” Monday ever. You feel like a failure. You feel like anyone… everyone, could do a better job parenting than you. But we do the best we can.
But even with that kind of day, there is a silver lining. Jonah… mid-meltdown… was able to verbally communicate what was bothering him and we were able to get through it in less than 5 minutes…
Things got better…
I told Jonny, we need to do a better job preparing the night before, so we aren’t rushing around when it is time to leave. Maybe I’ll even make lunches the night before… We will do better… But even so,
Days like that are just going to happen. And you know what?
Win or lose. Failure or success. We will get back up and try again tomorrow.
We will continue to strive to do better.
(Love this from Stories About Autism)