I think this is something we choose to ignore as special needs parents, at least when our children are young.
We just don’t know what the future holds, so we cling to the ideas and ideals of “hope” for our children and their development.
But what happens as our kids get older, is we start to see their level of progression as the years go by.
We don’t ever “lose” that “hope,” but we also have to start preparing for the future.
We have to make progression plans for school. We have to make ESTATE plans, and disability trusts for their future should something happen to US.
We have to actually consider and prepare for a theoretical future our kids may not ever see, and also prepare and plan for alternatives.
We have to try to answer tough questions about their future, even if we don’t want to consider the implications.
For their whole lives, we have thought in terms of development potential. Our child simply “has not YET…” (but they will eventually)…
But somewhere in those preparations and considerations for the future, we are forced to consider and prepare ourselves for the possibility that our child “may not EVER…”
And that is a TOUGH pill to swallow…
We work so tirelessly on development and life skills. We want to believe that the final outcome of all of that hard work is the “success” we envisioned.
We think to ourselves, “He’ll work hard and climb that mountain or he’ll find another path around it to be successful.”
But “what if he doesn’t?”
What if?
That’s something we don’t WANT to think about. It’s something we chide ourselves for thinking about.
We IGNORE that nagging thought.
We think to ourselves, “We’ll cross that bridge when we get there.”
…if we get there.
But the thing is, some of us are at that bridge now.
That bridge between “yet” and “ever.”
And I think that on this journey, that is the hardest bridge to cross.
#ausome