Jojo had a meltdown for about half an hour at bed time last night. We got him a new bed tent and he liked it during the day but it did not fit in with our bedtime routine.
So meltdown. He’s now added vicious kicking to his arsenal…unfortunately.
I feel the need to vent about meltdowns less and less.
Perhaps I am getting used to dealing with them, or perhaps Jojo is getting better at managing them.
Whatever the case, this small step is progress for both of us.
Where once I needed to get all my emotions out there in a blog or post during a meltdown, now, maybe I don’t feel quite as … helpless in handling them.
By “handling,” all I really do is sit there quietly, while he rages and try to not let him or anyone else get hurt.
I feel like I KNOW he will get through it, and will fall asleep in a relatively short amount of time and be fine.
Before, I did not have that certainty. It could last a few minutes or half the night.
That’s what it really boils down to.
That is what I have slowly been confronting.
That is what I am learning to overcome.
The fear of uncertainty.
I am not afraid anymore. I have decided that I will not live my life in fear. All the little questions that plague us as autism parents about our kids boil down to a fear of the unknown.
And that can be crippling.
I’ve decided to focus on what I am able to do help him and not focus on what he is unable to do. I have faith that Jojo …though I don’t always see it… is capable of extraordinary things.
Every single day.
